Being a mommy is the hardest, most frustratingly beautiful thing I will ever do with my life. It's about knowing my shortcomings, knowing theirs too, and loving one another despite those things. To all of the ladies who are mommies, who miss a mom, who are craving motherhood... I hope you feel loved and know that being real is a million times more beautiful than being perfect. So embrace those ponytails, long nights, dirty feet, and those hard days filled with tears or empty arms like you mean it.
I know I will never be this loved again at any other point in my life. My children love me in a way that I can only imagine God loves me. They see my faults, they see when I'm weak, and nothing could talk them out of still loving me completely. However, my children's love is different than God's because one day, it will turn into a choice. One day, it will be conditional. My son and daughter will assess what we've shared and get to decide if a true and honest love still exists between us. In order for that to happen, I must love them in a way that teaches them to love. I must protect their hearts so they stay soft. I must convince them that there's enough love in the world to keep going, even when the uglier, desperate times visit. I must point them in a direction that keeps them believing that they don't have to ever be alone.
My purpose is turn their purpose into loving God and other people.
But, raising these babies day to day, minute to minute is hurried, and impatient, and thoughtless sometimes. I forget about Him, them, or what I'm trying to do with both of those things. I focus on where we need to be, what I need to accomplish, and all of the things that are waiting on me. But the real deal is, they are waiting because they can. My babies can't. Their childhood is today. Their hearts are open today. They crave me and want me to be their Mommy this very minute. I am in charge of those things and how they will translate the messages I send, the words I speak, and the real, real love I give.
Today, and every day after that, I must slow down, be intentional, invite God into the job of parenting, remember to show grace just as I've been shown, and speak and love tenderly, for they are small and could break easily.
Regan and Tyler- My greatest moments are because of you. You are desperately, unconditionally loved today and every day that will ever follow.
Happy Mother's Day...
