Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Hi... my name is Mama.

I'm not an artist, a gardener, or a tuba player. I'm not an English teacher anymore. I am a Mom. I love my children more than anything, as most mom's do. I also can't help but feel like there's more out there for me.
When I transitioned from full time employee to full time mama, I devoted my entire life to my children. I was no longer the person that used to exist before these tiny little dependents came. It's almost like a whole person disappeared.
I used to wear make up. I used to wear pants with buttons and zippers. I used to rate my worth based on how many lesson plans I was able to create, how many professional development seminars I attended, or how many students I was able to connect with on a certain day. I knew I was going to be acknowledged, reviewed, and compensated every week. Now, if someone were to ask me about myself, what would I say? I'm a mama. What about that answer differentiates me from all of the other millions of mamas out there? Who the heck am I? No one wants to be just one thing, do they?
Everyday, I teach my children to be multifaceted. I would never teach them just to love reading. Sure, I want them to love literature and books, and learning, but I also want them to love art, and sports, and their friends, and science, and movies, and crafts, and Jesus. See, I want them to know all of the things they are able to do.
For me, most days include playing zoo, watching cartoons, wiping butts, feeding the fish, cleaning up crafts, or running errands. It's a constant struggle to feel important while doing these sometimes mind numbing tasks. It's even harder to remember who I am. So, as I teach my children all of the things they can be or do, I need to focus on the same way of thinking. Children learn by example. So, if I am "just Mom," that's no good.
I often need to focus on my self worth. I think all mamas should. Even if we are no longer able to do ALL of the things we once enjoyed, focusing on a few makes for a happy mama AND a happy family.
SO, I have decided to make a conscious effort to be more than Mom. Sure, that's always going to be my most important role; however, it can't be my only role. While I am no master chef, animal rescuer, or violinist, I am going to focus on what I am passionate about and what I can do while still focusing on my number one job.
I will show my children that I am  a photographer, a blogger, a writer, a Zumba enthusiast, a church attending Christian who walks with and loves the Lord, a family member, a friend, a movie goer who loves dramas and documentaries, a volunteer for schools, a decorator, and a crafting how bow lover. I can be a mama and more! And, so can you. What do you love, besides your children?


  1. I love this entry! I have definitely been lost in mommy land for about a year now. It's easier now to do more things I enjoy because Annabelle is getting bigger. But now I tell myself the same thing when I'm about to do something for myself and start to feel mother's guilt. Thanks for sharing this; it's nice to know I'm not alone, and I shouldn't feel bad about it.

  2. Love it! Being a mom is one of the hardest but most rewarding jobs! I totally agree that we need other passions too. It makes us better mommies and wives, even if we feel guilty half the time!! Miss you

  3. Welcome to blogging! So glad you found me. Being a mom is the most rewarding yet hardest job ever!!! XOXO

  4. Great entry! I have found that no matter how many things I throw myself at, (blogging, designing clothes, creating parties, going green, etc...) the only thing in life that can truly fulfill me is God. I know you will be good at whatever your passion is, but on top of that, cling to your bible and God will show you your true purpose. You rock at everything you do, good luck with your search! :)

  5. I am loving your blogs. I read them daily and they make me think about a lot of things inside and out.

  6. A beautiful bunch of peoples!
    I love you all, Rachel. ;)

  7. amen. it sure is easy to lose yourself. i remember people asking me what i liked to do in my free time. for one, i didn't have free time, and two...i had no idea! color? go to the zoo??!! i didn't know what I liked anymore.


  8. I love this post. I am still discovering who I am...it's an ongoing process. I for sure love photography, though!!!!!